7 Manifestation Techniques to Shift Your Self Concept in Love
To change your romantic life, you must shift within! These manifestation techniques are a good stary to shift your self concept in love.
There are multiple ways to affirm a new self concept to improve your love life. Depending on your comfort level and schedule, you may find that one manifestation technique is easier to maintain than another.
A gentle warning! Don’t obsess over techniques when manifesting. Don’t beat yourself up if you don’t follow a strict routine. Live your life!
Now, before we get into manifestation techniques for self concept, let’s review the meaning of self concept.
What is Self Concept?
Self concept is how we identify via our core beliefs. Our belief system is created via our childhood experiences and experiences and thoughts thereafter.
Our self concept becomes our mirror, so to speak. That’s why it’s so important to identify as confident, secure, loved, chosen, prioritized, successful, and irresistible in love!
Need help identifying your self concept in love? A good place to start is to ask yourself who you think you are concerning love. How would you describe your romantic experiences from an “I am” point of view?
If you’ve already defined your self concept in love, keep reading for manifestation techniques.
7 Manifestation Techniques to Shift Your Self Concept in Love
Manifestation Technique #1: Affirming
Affirming is just thinking with intentionality. We think approximately 60,000 thoughts a day. When you affirm as a manifestation technique, you are choosing the thoughts that you are thinking.
Methods of Affirming
There are multiple ways to affirm. Below I break them down so you can decide what method works best for you.
Robotic affirming (Sammy Ingram’s Method)
When you robotically affirm, you repeat one affirmation for a desire (self concept, specific person, money, love, etc) all day every day. Whether you’re watching a movie, at a work meeting, or on a walk, you loop the affirmation. It’s all you focus on.
Why some people don’t like robotic affirming
When you begin robotic affirming it feels more difficult to ignore the 3D, especially if you’re not seeing any signs that your desires are manifesting. Some folks also feel that robotic affirming is mentally exhausting and anxiety-inducing. Others tend to constantly check the 3D to see if their desire has manifested. If it hasn’t, it can feel disheartening.
This is when most people stop affirming. Sammy Ingram says to keep going no matter what you see in the 3D.
So, does robotic affirming work? I believe it can be if it’s not constantly triggering you to search for evidence. Bottom line: do what feels healthiest and most sustainable for you.
Mindless affirming.
Mindless affirming is a less extreme version of robotic affirming. You affirm when you’re your mind is on autopilot, like when doing tasks like washing dishes, taking a shower, driving, or putting away laundry or groceries,
Intentional affirming.
This is when you affirm 2-3 times a day for 5-10 minutes a day. Like when meditating, you close your eyes and repeat your affirmations. Repeat 1-5 affirmations slowly so they sink into your subconscious mind easily. Focus on each word and what you are saying to prevent your mind from wandering.
If you don’t have a lot of time in the day to affirm, affirm right before bed when drifting off to sleep and/or right when you wake up. Our subconscious mind is completely open during these times and, therefore, more susceptible to auto-suggestion.
Dylan James, another popular mindset coach on YouTube, advises we visualize the words as we repeat our affirmations. Our mind thinks in images, so this method helps our subconscious mind cement our affirmations since we’re presenting them as a visual. Simply close your eyes and see the words crossing your mind as if you’re reading a book. You can also visualize a scene while you affirm (more on that later).
Bonus tip when intentionally affirming: Record your affirmations on your phone and leave enough space in between each affirmation. Repeat the affirmations back to yourself (aloud or in your head, it doesn’t matter!). Set a timer for 10 minutes, put on your earbuds, and affirm.
Manifestation Technique #2: Scripting
Scripting is journaling. However, when you script you write your affirmations for 5-10 minutes. It’s a good way to focus on your affirmations and focus on the words you’re writing (that mental image boost!). Also, a study shows that writing things down helps us memorize things faster.
Type of Scripting
Script the same affirmations repeatedly.
For 5-10 minutes, write your affirmations over and over again while repeating the affirmation in your mind or out loud. This is a more straightforward approach to scripting built on the belief that we manifest with repetition. The more we repeat one statement (affirmation) the faster our subconscious mind takes it as fact, and the faster we create it in our 3D reality.
Free writing.
Write whatever statements come to mind that indicate you are living in your desired reality. (Or that you will eventually get what you want.) The context and topic are the same, you’re just claiming it in a variety of ways.
For example, instead of writing “I am easily committed to” repeatedly, you would write:
I am easily committed to. Men commit to me so easily. Relationships are effortless for me. Commitment has always come easy for me. Men always commit to me quickly.
Manifestation Technique #3: Visualizing in SATS (State Akin to Sleep)
Using visualization before bed and in the morning is a popular technique popularized by law of assumption guru, Neville Goddard. His book, The Law and the Promise relays tons of manifestation success stories just with visualization.
So, how do you do it? Here’s a quick breakdown.
Specify a desire. What do you want to change in how you identify in love? For example, maybe you want to be a woman who meets healthy, attractive partners easily or a woman who has a plethora of options in love. Or, you desire to be a woman who is loved unconditionally by a romantic partner. Whatever it is, decide.
Create a 3-second scene. What does it look like to be that new woman? How do you feel? How does your partner treat you? What does he or she say? Brainstorm so that you can solidify the context of your visual. Many people envision their partner saying “I do,” “I love you,” or even giving them a loving kiss while cuddled in bed. The scene should make you feel good and indicate that you have what you desire because you are that version of yourself right now.
Loop the scene. Right before you drift off to sleep, loop your 3-second scene as if you’re living that scene right then and there. Keep looping it, but don’t fall asleep immediately. When you're in SATS (State Akin to Sleep) you’re not awake or asleep just yet. It’s that drowsy state. Loop that scene for as long as you can before sleep. Do it again when you wake from slumber. Keep repeating this practice until your desire manifests.
Manifestation Technique #4: Inner Conversation
Inner conversations are an amazing manifestation technique to shift your self concept in love. And it’s as easy as hearing yourself have a conversation in your mind with someone you are close to!
Like visualizing in SATS, specify a desire. Only you’re going to loop a 3-second conversation in your mind before bed and in the morning when you wake up. You can also do this throughout the day when on autopilot (driving, doing housework, etc). The goal is to have a quick dialogue that represents you’re the version of yourself who has your desired love life. Some examples of conversations include:
Inner Conversation Ex. 1:
You: I feel so loved!
Your Person: You deserve it.
Inner Conversation Ex. 2:
You: I am in the best relationship.
Your Person: I’m so happy for you.
The dialogue of your inner conversation should sound as natural as possible. How would you speak to your friend, mom, coworker, sister, etc about having your desired love life? How would they naturally respond? This is how to create an inner conversation when using this manifestation technique.
Manifestation Technique #5: Sleep Audio (Dylan James’ Method)
I consider using sleep audio as the secret sauce of mindset shifting. (Mindset shifting is all manifestation is!) Why does sleep audio help? Because, while our subconscious mind is wide awake you (and your conscious mind) are asleep. This allows the affirmations in your nightly audio to penetrate your subconscious mind without interruption.
There’s no arguing with yourself over your thoughts, flipping thoughts, or replaying unfavorable circumstances. There’s no overthinking. While you sleep and your affirmations play over audio, rest assured that you are reprogramming your mind.
How long should you listen for? Dylan James suggests a minimum of 21 days. However, in my experience, you’ll know when to stop listening to your affirmations while you sleep. You will feel different and notice you’ve shifted. Your natural thoughts will align with the affirmations you’ve been listening to. In response to this mindset shift, your feelings, behaviors, emotional responses and reactions, and decision-making will shift. Eventually, you will experience your desired reality and your love manifestations will come in.
Manifestation Technique #6: Decide (Manifesting with Kimberly’s Method)
Manifesting with Kimberly is big on “deciding” that you have what you want (or will have what you want). She calls it the “lazy way of manifesting,” which I love. So, how does one just ‘decide’? It’s all about conviction.
Let’s say that you want to be the version of you that is always chosen in love. You say, “You know what? Yes. That’s who I am. I am always chosen in love and I’m not accepting anything but that experience.”
Then you return to your decision over and over again. As in, when an opposing thought that you aren’t chosen pops up, you say, “No. I am chosen. I am new self.” (“New self” is a Kimberly term.)
The more you do this the fewer opposing thoughts will arise. You’ll waver and spiral less because you are sticking to the decision that you have (or will get) what you want. This is why “deciding” is a low-lift way to manifest. Cause it’s all about your mental diet.
Manifestation Technique #7: Mental Diet
A mental diet is the practice of observing your thoughts. When you have a “healthy” mental diet, you observe your thoughts and notice if they align with your desires. For example, if you’re manifesting a self concept in love where you are always prioritized in relationships, your thoughts should align with that identity. Some thoughts may include:
Men always make time for me.
I am always pursued.
He always wants to spend time with me.
I know he’ll call/text me soon.
I am so important to him.
Whereas, if you have a self concept in love where you identify as a woman who is last on the totem pole, your thoughts might be something like this:
He never makes time for me.
Why am I always the first one to contact him?
He doesn’t prioritize me.
I feel like I have to put in all the effort with him.
I’m afraid I won’t hear from him.
In essence, your mental diet is your gauge. It reveals if you’ve shifted into a new version of yourself or if you’re still teetering between the old you and the new you.
Final thoughts on manifestation techniques.
If you notice yourself fighting off negative thoughts constantly, don’t give up and give breathwork a try. It takes time to change an old belief about yourself and your relationships. It all depends on your personal experiences and beliefs about love.
Show yourself grace through this process. You are human. You will have bad days. You may cry, get angry, or react. That is okay - and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!
Remember that nothing stops your desires from coming in but you. You can manifest and attract what you desire in love. My best advice is to live your life with gratitude and a knowing that it’s all working out for you, or as I like to affirm, “Everything is leading me to my desires.”